15 Questions He's DYING To Ask You

Wouldn't it be awesome if we could read guys' minds? All of the mysteries of the world would be solved if we could just climb up into those craniums and figure out what is going on up there. Even though it may seem like the lights aren't always on upstairs when it comes to guys, we promise the lights are just on a dimmer switch. The gears are turning up there - just a bit slower than we'd might like. But now is the time for some answers. We want to know what guys are thinking! It turns out, men have a bunch of questions they are just dying to ask us. They're curious and some things about women totally befuddle them. We can't totally blame them. Us ladies are complex so it's natural that guys will be a bit confused about everything going on. So now is our chance to finally get into their heads and see what they're really thinking. Here are 15 questions men are dying to ask us ladies, but won't ever say out loud. C'mon guys, we're not that scary? Go ahead and ask us in person! We promise we won't bite (too hard).

15 How Many Guys Have You Slept With?

Okay, we get it. Because this is a question that we often want to ask the guy we're dating too. But can we all just agree that we'd rather a ballpark than an actual figure? Basically, we want to know if a guy is new to the game or if he's experienced. And if he is experienced, we want to know how experienced and if we need to go get tested for something. But the reason most men won't ask this question and why women hesitate to answer is embarrassment and nervousness on everyone's part. We don't want to make our man feel bad if his number is smaller than ours. And we don't want to feel inferior if his number is bigger than ours. A small number makes you seem lame but a big number makes you seem easy. There's no winning! So let's just agree to throw out the numbers and go with general ballpark figures or vague ideas.

14 Do You Want Me To Send You A Picture Of My Junk?

Listen when we say this men: the answer to this question, almost 100% of the time, is a hard and fast NOPE! The only, very rare, time the answer is yes is if a lady specifically asks you to send her a photo of your junk. So please do not send us an unsolicited d-pic under any circumstances! It is not appreciated. Guys, we get that you're obsessed with your mini you but we're really not. We appreciate what they can do but to be honest, they're kind of ugly. So we're not going to be framing your junk and putting it above our mantle anytime soon. And when you send a pic out of nowhere, we're even more turned off. We might be at brunch with our girlfriends, in class or having tea with our grandma and BAM here comes your member. Was he invited to this function? We didn't think so! Keep it in your pants, boys.

13 How Soon Are You Expecting Me To Put A Ring On It?

This is a hard question to answer because there isn't one answer for all women. Sorry, guys! Unfortunately, every woman is different. Some women are going to want a ring on their finger within a year or two of dating and other women might not even want to talk about marriage until after five years. But luckily, there are some hints. If your lady can't stop talking about weddings and is always adding floral arrangements and dresses to her Pinterest board, she might have rings on the mind. The best solution here is to talk to your girlfriend and see where her head is at. Yes, we'd prefer the actual proposal to be a surprise so please don't ask, "When should I propose?" But you should be able to have a conversation about your future together and what you're planning. The proposal can be a surprise but the idea of marriage should be something you both have a timeline for.

12 Why Do You Girls All Go To The Bathroom Together?

We love that this one baffles men so much! In fact, we probably go to the bathroom in packs more now that we know it confuses you so much. But, there are a few practical reasons for us to go with the gang. First of all, it's a great time for us to chat. We can gossip about the cute guy we saw by the bar or warn our friends about the creeper on the dance floor. It's also a great opportunity to borrow someone's lipstick or a feminine product if we need one. Women's bathrooms are notorious for having a line so when we go in a group, we have people to help us pass the time. Going in a group is also a safety measure. If we're in a new place, we probably don't want to be anywhere alone. So you see? We have lots of great reasons for calling the squad when nature calls.

11 Why Does It Take You So Long To Get Ready?

Because it takes a lot of work to look like this! You don't think we wake up like this, do you? There's the hair, the makeup, the outfit, and the accessories. And before that there's showering, shaving, waxing, manicures, pedicures and god knows what else. And then there are all of the tough decisions because there are so many choices. It's a whole process to go from gross to glam. You just get to see the finished product. You have no idea how much goes into all of this. We wish we had it easy like you guys. Just a bar of soap, some deodorant, and maybe cologne. You run your hands through your hair, slip on your one good pair of jeans and a clean shirt and presto, you're ready to go. It just doesn't work like that for us ladies. But you have to admit you love the finished product, right?

10 What Do You Even Keep In Those Huge Purses?

Everything. Literally, everything. Have to sneeze? We have tissues. Have to touch something gross on the street? We have hand sanitizer. Cut yourself? We've got bandaids. Want to write something down? We've got a pen. And that's on top of our phone, wallet, keys, makeup, ear buds and everything else. Don't be surprised if we pull out a spare shirt or even a granola bar for when we get snacky. But if we're being honest, a lot of our giant purse is also filled with old wrappers, receipts, gift cards with no money left on them and other things we promised to throw out months ago. We really need to clean out our purse. But our question for you guys is how you get by without a purse. Seriously, how do you go all day with just your wallet, keys, and phone in your back pocket? We would feel naked without our purses.

9 Do I Have To Put The Toilet Seat Down?

Guys, you know the answer to this one. YES! Yes, you do have to put the toilet seat down. And please don't whine about it. It's not hard to put it down. And if you look at the numbers, it just makes sense. We need it down 100% of the time and you guys need it down part of the time too. So standing is less than 50% of the time meaning the seat should remain down. But let us tell you what our big issue is with the toilet seat. We get on your case about putting it down because we do not want to touch it. It's gross! And you know who makes it gross? You. So since you're the one who makes the mess, you should be the one who has to hide it away until cleaning day. And if you've ever gone to the bathroom in the middle of the night without turning on the lights only to fall in because your man left the toilet seat up, you know how important it is for that seat to always stay down!

8 What's It Like To Have Your Period?

Uncomfortable. Having your period is no picnic. But it also changes from woman to woman. For the lucky ones, our flow is a mild annoyance. We might have some sugar cravings or a few moody days in the week before. And then the week of, we have to put away our white pants, carry supplies in our purse, and maybe visit the bathroom a bit more often. But for other women, our monthly gift is agony. We have horrible headaches, cramps, mood swings, and cravings. We're attached to our hot water bottles and run out of Midol almost every month. We're crying and we're not sure if it's the hormones or the pain. So if a woman tells you it's that time of the month, please don't make a joke or pretend like you get what she's going through. Don't tell her to suck it up or disregard her opinion because she's moody. As Rachel said on Friends, "No uterus - no opinion!"

7 Do I Always Have To Pay For The Date?

In short, the answer is no. If you're dating someone who makes you pay every time the two of you go out, you're not dating a very good person. By the second or third date, you should be splitting the bill or trading off who pays. In general, we appreciate when guys pick up the tab on the first date. It's not always necessary, but it is a nice gesture. It shows us that you want to treat us special and that you've enjoyed the date with us. Especially if you're the one who asks us out, you should be prepared to pay for that date. Money is awkward and first dates are awkward so why make the first date more awkward by adding money problems? Just suck it up and pay for that one. Now on date #2, you both should reach for your wallet. You can split it or if she pays, tell her you'll get the next one. That way, you're being fair and you're setting yourself up for the next date!

6 Why Do Girls Never Know What They Want To Eat?

Guys, if we knew the answer to this one, we'd be able to solve all of our problems. It's embarrassing how much time we spend thinking about food and what we want to eat. We are literally paralyzed by our indecision. And you know why? Because there are too many choices! We struggle going with our gut, literally, and get bogged down with all the different food options. Do we want Chinese, Japanese, Mexican, Italian? We don't know! So how can you help? Be patient and narrow it down. Instead of asking us what we want to eat, give us a few choices. It won't work everytime, but it is helpful if we only have to decide between three restaurants instead of every restaurant in the city. And please be patient with us. We hate that we can't decide too. And we know we get a little hangry (hungry + angry) during the process. We promise to be nice again once we're fed.

5 Do You Know When I'm Checking You Out?

Yes, we usually do. And it's not because we have an extra pair of eyes. It's because you guys are really obvious when you're checking us out. You don't just stare with your eyes. You stare with your whole face! Your mouth opens and you have to crane your head to the side. And you can't multitask, so we know you've zoned out when you stop listening or responding. Plus, we do have extra eyes in our friends. If you're checking us out and we miss it, you better believe our friends will fill us in. That's another thing we trade notes on when we go to the bathroom! But know that we can also tell when you're checking out someone else. So don't think you're getting away with it when you turn around or lean out of your chance to catch a glimpse of something pretty walking by. We see you!

4 Why Do You Fake Your Finish?

We're not proud of this. And to be fair, we are trying to stop faking it as much as possible. If we keep faking it, you'll keep thinking you're doing a good job and we'll keep being unsatisfied. So it's a lose-lose for us. But we fake it because we care! It comes from a good place, we promise. We just don't want to hurt your feelings or make you feel bad. We're trying to avoid an awkward conversation. We know that's bad, and we're working on it, but sometimes we just fake it to get it over with. You guys are so obsessed with a big finish that it's hard to let you down. We can have fun without a big finish. And in some situations, we fake it just to make it end sooner. If we're not having a good time and we think faking it will be a good way to get out, we do it. So if it's a one night stand and you don't hear from us again, that dramatic finish may have not been real.

3 How Do I Get Out Of The Friend Zone?

First things first, you are not entitled to be more than a friend. You don't get to date us or sleep with us just because you've put in your time as our friend. That's not how relationships work. So please don't go whining about the friend zone and how you're stuck in it. Your first step to getting out is letting us know you want out. We can't read minds either. So muster your courage, tell us how you feel, and ask us on a date. If we feel the same or we're interested, we'll say yes and congrats, you're out of the friend zone. But there's a chance we don't feel the same way. So then you get to go home, lick your wounds and rebuild your pride. The next couple weeks might be a bit awkward but eventually, we can get back to our awesome friendship. If that's not enough for you, maybe you aren't that good a friend anyway.

2 Why Do You Say You're Fine When You're Clearly Not Fine?

First of all, you only ever ask if we are fine when you know we are not fine. So do not pretend like you can't read emotions. You know we're not fine. But sometimes we're just not ready to share how we're really feeling. Maybe we're out in public and we are trying to keep our cool. Or maybe we haven't processed yet and don't know how to tell you how we're feeling. So just give us some time. We'll probably want to revisit it and talk about whatever happened. But we might not want to talk right now. Use the time to think back over the last few moments to see what led up to us feeling not fine. Did you do something stupid? Feel free to start apologizing and save us all some time. But those apologies better be sincere or else things could get worse for you.

1 Does Size Really Matter?

Yes and no. Size is a factor. But skill is way more important. If you know what you're doing, we probably won't even notice the size of what you got down there. We're more concerned about how you make us feel and what the rest of you is doing. No girl is going to pull out a measuring tape or give you grief because you're an inch smaller than her ex was. If you're exceptionally small or exceptionally large, we'll definitely notice. But like we said, we care more about what you can do with that size than the size itself. And when we get into bed with you for the first time, your size is the least of our concerns. We're worried about our breath, our hair, our noises, our smells, and a bunch of other things that could make a first time awkward or uncomfortable. So please, just relax about this whole size thing.