20 Celebs Open Up About Their Biggest Heartbreaks (& The Lessons They Learned)
Breaking up is no fun, and it's no easier for the celebrities of the world who have to suffer their breakups in the public eye. Whether you are a famous celebrity or a regular Joe, at some point, you have likely had your heart crushed into a million pieces. Of course, celebs have to live out their heartbreak on a pedestal.
The holidays are coming up and believe it or not, it's the most popular time to be dumped. December 11th is the day you want to avoid since two weeks before Christmas is the most popular time for couples to break up. Maybe it's the pressure of the holidays, or maybe one of the two wants to start the New Year off fresh. Whatever the reason, we are coming upon a time when breakups are happening.
We are going to take a look at some celebrity breakups and the lessons that were learned in these situations. Some of the breakups we can still feel years later and some of the celebrities have had time to reflect on that painful time. There is a lot we can learn from someone else's breakup. Check out these 20 celebs opening up about their biggest heartbreaks (and sharing the lessons they learned).
20 Jennifer Aniston Suggests Accepting The Pain
Jennifer's breakup with Brad Pitt was felt all around the world, so much so that when the two became single again, fans were hoping they would just pick up where they left off.
When we break up we often do things to try to avoid the pain, but Aniston says you have to let it in.
"There are many stages of grief. It's sad, something coming to an end. It cracks you open, in a way-cracks you open to feeling. When you try to avoid the pain, it creates greater pain. I'm a human being, having a human experience in front of the world. I wish it weren't in front of the world. I try really hard to rise above it."
19 Rihanna Suggests Crying It Out
The best thing you can do during a breakup is to allow yourself to cry it out if you feel like it. Keeping your feelings in all the time won't help anyone, and it will feel good to get it out. And as Rihanna notes, "Just believe that the heartbreak was a gift in itself. Cry if you have to, but it won't be forever! You will find love again, and it will be even more beautiful! In the meantime, enjoy all that YOU are!" It's pretty great advice coming from someone who knows breakups all too well, and complicated ones at that.
18 Jennifer Love Hewitt Suggests Looking Forward To The Future
When we go through a breakup it can be hard to look at it positively.
But one thing we should recognize is that a breakup can be a blessing because it leads us towards who we are really meant to be with.
Fortunately, Jennifer Love Hewitt knows that. "It's what life handed me, and I'm OK with it. I know wholeheartedly that I'm a really good partner. I think I'm a really good girlfriend, and I think that I could be a really good wife. I know that I love being able to give my love out to someone. I know there is somebody great out there for me."
17 Demi Moore Felt Abandoned After Her Breakup
Sometimes going through breakups help us learn something about ourselves. It may not be what we expected but we usually go through trials in our lives for a reason, as Demi shared. "I used to think that what scared me was the idea of being abandoned until someone said to me, 'Only children can be abandoned. Adults can't be abandoned because we have a choice. Children don't have a choice.' So I started to rethink. 'OK, it's not that. What's the underlying thread that really scares me?' I think what scares me is not having the courage to reach my full potential."
16 Madonna Threw Herself Into Her Work
Work can be cathartic especially if you are a creative person. Sometimes the best thing that you can do is throw yourself into your work so that you aren't constantly analyzing and going over your breakups and living in the past.
Having something to take your mind off the breakup is key.
That's what Madonna told Rolling Stone post-breakup; "I think work saved me, and I'm very grateful that I had work to do… Life is an adjustment. It's different… There are pros and cons, but I feel good now." Distractions are great, and doing something productive with your pain is even better.
15 Jessica Simpson Had To Make A Choice To Love Again
When Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey broke up, everyone was shocked because they had been together for a while and we couldn't imagine a more perfect couple. Jessica's divorce took its toll on her and at first, she wasn't sure she wanted to marry again. "It was hard to imagine I would ever walk down the aisle again. It was like a death in the family: You go through the mourning stage, then the rebellion, and then all of a sudden you have to find life by yourself. Once you do that, you feel complete-and that's the only time you can truly fall in love again and give yourself over completely to another person."
14 Vanessa Paradis Suggests Letting Go Of Something That Doesn't Work
Another breakup that fans were shocked by was between Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis. Although they were never married, the two had spent 14 years together and shared two children. However, their split happened largely out of the public eye since it was mostly drama-free.
But the refreshingly wise Paradis says that you can't force love; you have to let it go.
"Love is the strongest and most fragile thing we have in life. Nothing is ever for sure, but when something in love doesn't work from the beginning, it's never going to work. Don't push it."
13 Kim Kardashian Says Don't Beat Yourself Up About It
When you break up, it can be easy to play the blame game but there is no point in beating yourself up about something that wasn't meant to be, Kim K said. “I felt like I was on a fast roller coaster and couldn't get off, when now I know I probably should have. I got caught up with the hoopla and the filming of the TV show that when I probably should have ended my relationship, I didn't know how to and didn't want to disappoint a lot of people… But I do know that I have to follow my heart… It just didn't turn out to be the fairy tale I had so badly hoped for."
12 Nicole Kidman Advises To Not Feel Desperate
Back in the day, Nicole Kidman and Tom cruise were one of the hottest couples in Hollywood. They lived under the spotlight, and the breakup was a hard one for Nicole.
The two were together for a while but at the end of the day, she accepted the split because it wasn't meant to be.
“I'm not sure what the future holds but I do know that I'm going to be positive and not wake up feeling desperate. As my dad said, 'Nic, it is what it is, it's not what it should have been, not what it could have been, it is what it is.'"
11 Uma Thurman Learned It Takes Time To Heal
Uma Thurman and Erhan Hawke were the “IT” couple in the '90s and they were married for seven years before their breakup. It was not an easy one for Uma, who didn't see the split coming. "When I was first going through my separation, someone said to me, 'It will take you half as long as you were in the relationship before you'll feel better.' And I wanted to knock them out cold across the table. Because, of course, I was in agony. And the last thing I wanted to think was that I was going to stay that way for a long time. But interestingly enough, it is over four years later - we were together eight years - and I finally feel like, cool. I feel better."
10 Lauren Conrad Believes You Have To Feel The Entire Breakup
That's not something that a lot of people are comfortable with mainly because breakups hurt so much.
But Lauren learned it the hard way: through personal experience.
"There are those breakups that are so bad that you will need a good cry and a pint (or two) of Ben & Jerry's. Let yourself have what you need. Let yourself go and let yourself obsess over every little detail of the breakup and the relationship. You will need to do this for yourself. You will need to allow your mind to take it all in so that by the time you get back up on your feet, you know how you feel."
9 Ryan Phillippe Got Through The Worst Time Of His Life
Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon were another adorable couple from the late '90s and many fans were saddened when rumors came out about Phillippe and one of his costars. That was the end of Ryan's marriage to Reese and he states that things were not easy during that time. "[Divorce was] the darkest, saddest place I had ever been. It was a struggle-there were a good four or five months of not being able to get out of bed. It was the worst time in my life. You get through it. It's a process that's not easy, but I get less and less sad about it every day."
8 Robert Pattinson Learned To Get Over It
Robert Pattinson's heart was broken when Kristen Stewart broke things off with him and in a very public way. Not only did she break his heart but hundreds of Twilight fan's hearts as well. After all, everyone shipped their on-screen romance becoming real-life.
Pattinson eventually accepted the fact that they were both young at the time and probably weren't meant for each other.
"It's just young people… it's normal! And honestly, who [really cares]? The hardest part was talking about it afterwards. Because when you talk about other people, it affects them in ways you can't predict."
7 Cameron Diaz Reminds Us To Love Again
It can be hard to want to put your heart out there again once you have been hurt. But it's important to continue to love and that's something that Cameron Diaz told InStyle magazine. "When I was going through a bit of a heartbreak a little while ago, I said to a friend, 'Wow, this really hurts!' And he said to me, 'That just shows you what your capacity for loving is.' I would rather have my heart broken a thousand times than never to love at all. I have so much love to give-I'm not empty of love, I'm full of love."
6 Ben Affleck Took Some Time Off To Be Alone
A breakup like the one between Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez was big news and one that Affleck realized he couldn't hide from.
With any breakup, it's okay and even healthy to go off on your own and find some peace alone.
"I think I just ran away. You can only handle so much. I moved for a while to this place in Georgia that I have, was able to get away, by and large, from stuff. Come up with a plan for how to do something with my life that doesn't put me in the crosshairs of this sort of thing."
5 Khloé Kardashian Says To Stay Productive
Sometimes the best thing that you can do after a breakup is to stay productive, Khloe tells fans. “The busier you are, the less you're going to think about something, so I would try to consume your thoughts with productive things. Try to just find a hobby and keep yourself busy in a really positive way. Or surround yourself with friends and family that you love and who do really occupy your mind." It's pretty great advice and something you could consider following during a tough time, even if you're not a mega reality TV star like any of the Kardashians.
4 Katie Holmes Doesn't Define Herself By Her Breakups
One thing that Katie Holmes was determined to do after her massive breakup with Tom Cruise was to not let her former relationship define her. Of course, it didn't help that her rise to fame propelled her into the arms of someone who'd been in the business for decades already.
Katie decided she was worth more than what a breakup meant.
She told People magazine, "I don't want that moment in my life to define me, to be who I am. I don't want that to be what I'm known as. I was an actor before, an actor during and an actor now." She couldn't be more right.
3 Taylor Swift Writes About Her Breakups To Heal
Sometimes pouring yourself into writing whether it be songwriting or journaling helps you to heal quicker. It's a way of pouring your soul into something creative. "There's just been this earth-shattering, not recent, but absolute crash-and-burn heartbreak, and that will turn out to be what the next album is about. The only way that I can feel better about myself - pull myself out of that awful pain of losing someone - is writing songs about it to get some sort of clarity." Of course, you don't have to write catchy lyrics about every ex like Tay, but getting the feelings out helps!
2 Sandra Bullock Says Breakups Put You Where You Are Supposed To Be
That might be too profound for someone who is raw from a recent breakup.
But there is a lot of truth to Sandra's advice about moving on.
"We're all where we're supposed to be. I am exactly where I want to be now. You can't go backward. I'm not going backward. I'm grateful that I'm here, blessed to have what I have. Nobody can be prepared for anything. You end up in a place where you can look back and go, 'It happened, but I'm so lucky to be sitting where I am sitting.'" And the thing is, Sandra moved forward in big ways, all by herself.
1 Jennifer Lawrence Learned About Incompatibility
Sometimes a breakup is the best thing that could ever happen to us. It's the little things in a relationship that can make us realize that things just aren't going to work out with our partner. "I wake up earlier in the morning when I have new sponges. That counter doesn't even see it coming. [My ex-boyfriend] would never wring them out. We were in the kitchen once, and I picked up the sponge, and it was soapy and wet, and I was like, 'See? These are the kinds of things that make me think we are never going to work.'"