15 Of The Worst Tips We've All Given Our Friends

We mean well, but sometimes we give the worst advice. We base our advice on what worked for us or we give the advice that we wish we would have followed. But despite our best intentions, our advice sometimes falls short on being the best advice we could give our friends. We also tell little white lies. The last thing we want to do is hurt our friends' feelings, so we say “your hairs looks great” instead of helping her fix it up a bit or suggesting that maybe she should put it up in a pony tail or bun because she is obviously having a bad hair day.

And our friends do it to us, too. Remember when you were dating that boring guy from work? You wanted to end the relationship after a week, but your best friend kept telling you to give it time. She said “the best relationships don't have a lot of drama.” But when it came down to it, watching paint dry was more thrilling than sitting on the sofa and enduring another golf match on the television. You broke it off with him and you were relieved you didn't stick around.

Let's not forget that guy you used to date. He loved his german shepherd so much that you were starting to feel a bit jealous. When you told your friend about it, she told you to dump him. Immediately. You followed her advice and two weeks later, you find out on Twitter that she had started dating him. Sometimes the advice of friends and the advice you give doesn't spring from the best intentions.

15 “Just give him another chance.”

According to the Huffington Post, this is about the worst advice any of us can give to a friend. For example, your girlfriend just went out on a date with one of your guy friends. You like them both and want them to get along. In fact, it would be perfect if they started dating full time so that you and your man can double date with them. However, on that first date, your guy friend is rude. He shows up late, doesn't make any compliments, and insists on going Dutch. Everything he does sends up a red flag for your girlfriend, but you make excuses for him. You tell her he was probably just having a bad day. She really just needs to get to know him first and she should give him another chance, but the second chance doesn't work out any better and your girlfriend, feeling betrayed, will probably stop taking your advice.

14 “Play it hard to get.”

Your best friend just showed up at your place, excited about her first date with a guy she's had her eyes on for the past two weeks. She is positively gushing with excitement and, you've got to admit, she is starting to get on your nerves. You tell her to settle down, take a deep breath, and stop being so anxious. “When you get there, “ you tell her, “ don't look desperate. Play hard to get. Guys don't like it when women seem too eager.” Well, guess what? Guys don't get the Jedi mind tricks we play on them either and if they get the feeling that we aren't into them, they usually move onto someone who is.

The best thing you can do for your friend is help her prepare for her date. Help calm her nerves by telling her how great she is and that she needs to be herself. Be happy for her and wish her luck on her way out the door.

13 “Stop being so picky.”

You're married, and your friend should be, too. You keep trying to hook her up on dates and get her interested in going out with different guys, but she fights you at every turn. They are either not fit enough, not nice enough, or they don't have a good job. “Stop being so picky!” you tell her. Instead, you should sit back and relax. Your friend has standards and she is not interested in dating Mr. He'll Do. She doesn't want to be with someone she is not thrilled about and is waiting for Mr. Right to make her weak in the knees. Be a good friend by being her very best friend and give her the space she needs when it comes to choosing who to date.

12 “It's not you, it's him.”

You are out on a dinner date with your best friend and your boyfriend. As you are waiting for the food to arrive, they get into a heated discussion about politics. She agrees with absolutely everything he says, knowing full well that you don't share his political views. As time goes on, you get more and more annoyed with your friend. You know she doesn't really share his point of view, but she is making him think she does. Is she flirting with him? Is she trying to be better than you? You tell them you need to use the ladies room and leave the table. A moment later, your friend walks in and asks you what is wrong. Are you mad at her? “No,” you lie. “It's not you, it's him.”

11 “It will get better.”

Your friend just started taking a class at the local community college. You feel that this is a great opportunity for her and, feeling like a sister, you are proud of her. After a few classes, she comes over and tells you she is having a problem with a classmate. He keeps staring at her and making her feel really uncomfortable. She wants to talk to her school advisor about the situation, but you tell her to wait and give the situation some time. After all, this is such a great opportunity for her that you don't want her rocking the boat or drawing unnecessary attention to herself. Beside, maybe she is just imagining the staring. She is, after all, a bit of an introvert and doesn't socialize outside your small group of friends. “It'll get better,” you assure her.

Instead of dismissing how your friend is feeling, you should support her desire to address the situation. In fact, you should offer to go along with her as support when she goes to talk to her advisor. In this crazy world we live in, it really is best for women to be cautious and, sometimes, even suspicious if someone is acting a bit off or creepy.

10 “You can change him.”

He is rude to your mother. He blows you off to go hang out with his guy friends. He never puts the toilet lid down. You can rattle off a list a mile long in five minutes about all the things he does that drive you nuts, but your friend puts up her hand to stop you. “Listen,” she says, “you have to train him. You aren't going to find the perfect guy. You have to make him perfect. You can change him.”

Truth is, not everyone wants to change and if he is already getting on your nerves, the chances of him taking your feelings into consideration is slim to none. The best thing a friend can do in this situation is listen to the complaints and then ask what she wants to do. Sometimes accepting that she is not happy with her boyfriend and letting her talk about and decide if the relationship is worth saving really is the best thing to do for a friend.

9 “Have a drink.”

You and your friends all meet up at the club to hang out. Everyone orders an adult beverage, except one friend. She orders a diet soda and says she needs to keep her head clear because she has to go to work in the morning. You all press on and encourage her to just have one drink, let loose, and enjoy the evening. Work isn't until morning and you all have the night to party. Your friend caves in and one drink becomes two or three. The next morning, she not only feels like crap, but she regrets hanging out with her friends.

The best approach to a non drinking friend is to let them drink what they want. Respect their decision to not have any alcohol that night and, if you plan it right, you and your other friends can ask her to be the designated driver and, if she accepts, hand her some gas money plus a tip for tolerating her crazy bunch of friends.

8 “If you hate your job that much, just quit.”

Every time you see her, she complains about her job. Management sucks, no one in HR listens to the employees, the pay is terrible, and her co-worker in the next cubicle is always passing gas. You are tired of hearing about it. You look at her and say, “Just quit. You hate your job and it is making you miserable. Just quit and find a new one.”

While this may sound like the easiest solution to the problem, your friend also has bills and essential needs to consider. She can't just up and quit her job. Instead, ask her what her long term plans are. Is she just unwinding when she complains about her job or does she really want to find a better one? Help her check out the classified ads and job boards to see what else is out there. Tell her that you will support her decisions, but also let her know that, as a friend, she is stressing you out with her constant complaints about her work.

7 “Go ahead! Live life and eat.”

You watch what you eat, you exercise, and you work at keeping thin. It drives your friends nuts that you always look so slim and, secretly, they are jealous. They act out by trying to eat unhealthy foods, offering you candy bars, or taking you out to eat at a deep fry joint. They tell you to “live life to the fullest” and that life is too short to be on such a tight diet. It's as though they want you to gain weight and be unhealthy.

When your healthy life choices begin to clash with what your friends want for you, it is time to move on and find a new group of friends. Seek out people who also take care of their bodies and who know how hard it is to eat the right foods when dining out. In other words, find friends that will be a part of a support system so that you can all encourage each other to remain healthy.

6 “Oh no… it's not too tight.”

It took her five minutes to wriggle her bum into those jeans and now that she is up and standing again, she wants you to tell her how she looks. You want to say that she is spilling out over the top of the jeans and that they are way too tight on her, but you smile instead. “Are they too tight?” she asks. “No,” you lie, “they aren't too tight at all.” What wouldn't you say to keep your friend happy?

Sometimes we don't tell our friends the truth because we don't want to hurt their feelings, especially when it comes to weight or clothing not fitting right. We tell little white lies instead of carefully stating the truth, which is what we should be doing. In this situation, you might consider telling her that the jeans look too tight and that there is no way she could be comfortable in them. Try and convince her to wear something that fits her right and compliment her on her better choice. She will eventually come to rely on you for your clothing opinions, knowing that you have her best image in mind.

5 “Just buy it.”

Holy guacamole! You have been standing here in the department store for over 30 minutes with your friend as she debates whether or not to buy herself a new purse. At first, she can't make up her mind on which one to buy. When you finally get her to choose her favorite one, she debates loudly with herself, “should I or shouldn't I?” If this goes on any longer, you are going to scream. Finally, you tell her to “just buy it.” She shrugs one last time and decides to take your advice.

While getting your friend to make a purchase when she isn't completely sure she should can hurry things up for you, the better approach would be to suggest she go home and sleep on it. If she is having trouble making up her mind in the store, tell her to wait on it, to think it over, and if she still wants it the next day, it will be there (and if it isn't there, then it wasn't meant to be).

4 “Post that picture. It will totally make him jealous!”

Your friend thinks her boyfriend is flirting with another woman. She is upset and wants a way to get back at him. The two of you head out to blow some steam and, while at a local bar, you meet some good looking men. You tell your friend to strike a pose with one of the guys and you take a picture. Perfect! You send it to her phone and then lean over across the table and tell her to post it. “Go ahead. It will make him totally jealous.” She does, and suddenly there is an all out war between your friend and her boyfriend on Facebook. Your friend is even more upset than she was earlier and now it looks like she and her boyfriend might break it off.

Thinking back on that picture, you realize that telling her to post it wasn't the most brilliant idea you've had in your lifetime. You now regret having even suggested it. It would have been best if you'd have let your friend blow off steam and talk about her problems, instead of doubling the trouble by taking it to social media.

3 “You have to wait for the right moment.”

You have been best friends with her since third grade. Both of you were there for each other for the best and worst of times. Now she is talking about moving. It wouldn't be that bad if she was moving to a new apartment in town or if she was just moving an hour away. You would commute for a best friend, no problem. But she is talking about moving clear across the country for a dream job she may or may not be able to get. You'd hate to let her go and, what's worse, you'd hate to see her succeed and forget all about you. “Hold back,” you tell her. “Don't jump into this just yet. You have to wait for the right moment before you make a huge life change.” You then list a bunch of things she will need to do before she can consider following her dreams. Maybe if you put enough obstacles in her path she will just give up and stay by your side where she belongs.

2 “Men will never understand us.”

It was supposed to be a nice, relaxing afternoon by the pool, but for the past hour your friend has been complaining about her boyfriend. He doesn't do this for her, he forgot to remember that, and he never satisfies her every whim and desire. You feel like your head is going to split in half if she doesn't stop bitching. Finally, you look at her and say, “Girlfriend, you just need to accept that a guy is never going to understand us women.” And there is it. End of story and, after she agrees with you, it is the end of the bitchfest. Now maybe she will quiet up and let you get back to soaking up some rays.

1 “That outfit looks great!”

Which of us can honestly say that we have never given this little tidbit of bad advice to a friend? Let's say you and your friend are invited to a summer picnic with the gang. You show up at her house, ready to go, but she is still trying on outfits and fidgeting with what she has on. She can't decide on the perfect outfit. It has to be either the one she is wearing or the one thrown across her bed. While adjusting her cleavage, she asks you, “How do I look?” If you tell her the truth and say, “Like a big, trashy mess,” it will be at least another hour before she is ready. So, to keep the peace and get out the door you tell her she looks great. It's the perfect outfit for the occasion because everyone who is anyone wears heels and a short skirt to a picnic. Queue the eye roll.