13 Things We Are Taught To Stress About
There's that song from the Rodgers and Hammerstein Broadway hit musical Flower Drum Song that's entitled I Enjoy Being a Girl. The lyrics list all the little idiosyncrasies that only girls get to experience. Yes, it's a cute song, but many feminists in this day and age would cry foul and argue that the message that the song is sending is completely sexist because it portrays girls as objects.
Unfortunately, while women have come a long way from being regarded as mere objects or vessels to carry children, we still have a long way to go in terms of being deemed “equal” to men. We have made much progress in the workforce, with many women holding high positions in a corporate setting, yet we still don't get the same salary as the men who hold the same positions we do. And this includes women in Hollywood, who have also been fighting for equal pay. The list below itemizes other aspects wherein women are subject to that much-dreaded double standard.
13 Having smooth, clear skin
The poreless complexion is a goal almost every girl is adamant on attaining, but unfortunately, not all of us are born that lucky. Many Asian races like the Chinese, Korean, and Japanese have that enviable creamy white skin sans a single blemish or pore and this has become our standard of skin perfection. Somehow, if we don't have pancake-smooth skin, we obsess about covering up our facial flaws with heavy foundation and loads of concealer. Or if make-up won't do the trick, we spend tons of money on regular facials, diamond peels, and laser treatments.
12 Flawless in photos and selfies
Ever wondered what brought about the oh-so-famous and overused concept of selfies? It's rooted in that obsessive need to look picture perfect in photos and thanks to smart phones and social media, it's highly possible to look amazing in pictures nowadays. How many girls do we see holding their iPhones in front of their faces and snapping photo after photo? They can take dozens upon dozens of photos and still not be satisfied with how they look in each one. Maybe on their hundredth try, they're finally convinced they look perfect and promptly upload the photo to their Facebook or Instagram accounts.
11 Looking forever young
In terms of physical appearance, women aren't just pressured to look beautiful. We're also expected to have that eternal youthful glow. Of course, we can never slow down our bodies from aging biologically. But in terms of outer appearance, many women have turned to plastic surgery to slow down or even halt the aging process. Thanks to botox to remove those wrinkles and other costly procedures that stretch drooping skin, lift sagging eyes, and give you full, pouty lips, women today can manage to look 30 when in truth, we could be pushing 60.
10 Wearing the “perfect” outfit
Men complain that women have way too many articles of clothing and too many pairs of shoes, but there's a reason for this. It's because we're always expected to have that perfect outfit on, with nary a wrinkle or a crease in our blouses or skirts. But more than not having a stitch out of place, it's about how the outfit falls on our body and how much skin we should or shouldn't reveal. If our skirt is too short, we're asking for sex. If we wear ankle-length skirts, turtlenecks, and closed-toe shoes in summer, we're too prudish.
9 Hacks to hide physical flaws
Of course, we all have our flaws and no matter what we do, we can't get rid of moles or stretch marks or short, stumpy legs without resorting to surgery or asking for a miracle. So women are expected to know every hack out there to hide our flaws rather than embrace them. To hide stretch marks, bikinis are a no-no. To make up for short legs, we have to wear skinny pants and stilettos. For a pimple or a blemish, we pile on the facial foundation and concealer.
8 Where to shave or pluck or wax
On men, body and facial hair is considered oh-so-masculine and therefore sexy. But on women, hair that is anywhere else in our bodies other than our heads is considered a huge turn off. While there are some women who have boldly foregone shaving their armpits and their legs, having hair in these parts is generally frowned upon. Women are thus expected to shave our armpits, wax our legs (not shave, because the hair grows back coarse), get bikini waxes in our pubic area, and use wax strips to remove that very light smattering of hair above our lips because nobody wants to see a woman with a moustache!
7 How we look when we wake up
Maybe this doesn't matter too much if women who have been married for ten years to the same man wake up with drool on their pillow, wild hair in disarray, and that stretch-mark-ridden belly peeking out from a nightshirt that rides up on the torso. But for a woman who has slept with a guy for the first time? There's that pressure to be flawless the minute she wakes up beside him. No morning breath, hair must be artfully disheveled, and lots of creamy skin must be on display for body parts not covered by the sheets.
6 Being a jack of all trades
Ever since women have started entering the workforce, we've become forced to wear many, many hats. We aren't just employees or bosses in our high-pressure jobs. After work, we have to pick up our kids from daycare, rush home, cook dinner, do the laundry, get the kids ready for bed, then do our own personal tasks when the house is finally quiet. Apart from that, there are parent-teacher conferences to attend, brownies to be baked for the kids' school bake sale, and taking them to their soccer practices or ballet classes. Then we have our wifely duties as well. All that juggling is enough to give a woman a mental breakdown!
5 Having too many sexual partners
In terms of dating experience, men are lauded as heroes when they approach dating and sex with the attitude of collect and select. But when a woman is revealed to have had more than ten (or whatever the magic number is) sexual partners in her adult life? She's bordering on slutty. You can only imagine how the likes of Samantha from the hit TV show Sex and the City is looked at by the typical man. Probably as someone to go to for a roll in the hay, but not the kind of girl he'd take home to meet his mother.
4 Being too blunt or assertive
Women have been slowly but surely dominating the workforce and this has meant that the female species is learning how to become more and more vocal with our thoughts. But living in this male-dominated society, women who are too blunt or outspoken are looked at as crass and vulgar. We're expected to be as meek and submissive as our great-grandmothers were to their husbands and fathers, which is highly unfair if we're also expected to perform well in our jobs and make our way in this world.
3 Gaining weight
One of the many battles women have to contend with, much more than men, is the bulge. No thanks to Victoria's Secret angels strutting their stuff on high-profile runways, women are almost always expected to strive to have the figure of a model. As a result, we diet like crazy, workout til we drop, and resort to going into plastic surgery or liposuction just to get rid of the unnecessary flab. Not all of us can afford personal chefs and personal trainers, so it's unfortunate that many girls can go to means as drastic as starving themselves or force-vomiting out their food.
2 Having to be neat and organized
Maybe because tradition has long since dictated that women have to take care of the ins and outs of household chores, we are expected to be as neat as a pin at all times. While it's true that many women are indeed organized to the point of having an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), men can be neat nicks too, some more so than women. But no, women are the ones expected to have the organization skills between the two. It's unfair to expect this of us at all times, because women today aren't just housewives; we're mothers and employees in the workforce too!
1 Being single and having no kids in our 30s
Women are getting married later and later in life and today, it's considered completely normal to marry and have kids in our 40s. Normal maybe, but is it acceptable by conventional society's standards? Not by a long shot. As soon as a woman hits 30, the social pressure descends on her. Why don't you have a boyfriend yet? At 35: Aren't you getting married anytime soon? And at 38, we get Your biological clock is ticking! Your ovaries will be out of commission soon!
Sources: bustle.com, dailymail.co.uk, huffingtonpost.com, allwomenstalk.com